San Francisco Introduction


OVERVIEW: Oh for goodness’ sake. This is San Francisco.

SURFING: Now I will babble, because Nature’s Insane Asylum here is my Home Break.

There is surfing ’round these parts- that is, if you’re a masochistic freak. Rips, severe beatings, and long hold-downs are your reward for the marathon effort it took to reach that peak you just saw. You know the one. That damned mirage which vanished the moment you finally fucking gasped into the lineup. Now you’re 1/4 mile offshore and have to figure out how on earth to get back to the beach without calling the Coast Guard. Use your energy wisely, because not a session will go by without a set that INSISTS it unloads smacked dab on your head. Waves close out at sizes ranging from pipsqueek to jumbo, and also have an exciting habit of jacking up the moment you jump to your feet – a great help if you love to fly, but not so great if you love to surf. It’s no surprise that drownings occur every year, including surfers. Nobody paddles around this place for long without AT LEAST once being convinced they were going to die. Surfers here need more balls than brains, or, if you’re like me and don’t have balls, no brains at all. Even on small days – my ‘forte’- this place can be wicked fierce. Home Break is less surfatory and more exploratory, each session is all about heading off yonder into…Situation X. People ask me what gym I go to, and I just laugh and laugh. Caloric output per actual ride snatched ratio assessment ; 5,000 /1 .

The big beach can be roughly divided into three sections. Running from north to south; Chiropractics, Stress Test, and What Was I Thinking. Each carries its own, um, charms. If neither that nor the near constant 20 knot on shores floats your boat, there are other local options. Tourist Trap and Zombies!  Are the nearest contenders.

For more personal details on the joys of Home Break, check out my surfing magazine writing contest essay, it won an honorable mention!

STROLLING: Virtually all info is available online or via sordid rumors, depending on the experience you’re looking for. That said, for a spontaneous trail not listed anywhere, the hike between your parking spot and actual destination can be quite invigorating. The now-you-see-it-now-you-don’t public transportation system can also precipitate walking adventures.


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