The Rolling Pin Bake & Brew

230c 2nd. St. * Bandon OR 97411 * 541-252-5244 * therollingpinbb.com

Shaped and size like a rolling pin, you would not BELIEVE the yummies they fit in here.

The Rolling Pin rolled up into downtown Bandon where they appear to be absolutely dominating the cupcake business. SPECIAL GUEST RACHEL and I barged in and noted they have sweet and savory deliciousnesses, including, I just realized, hand apple pies!

However, hand apple pies were not available on our visit, so we dove into their Herculean cupcake menu. If ever there was a cupcake to be had, ‘lo, it is here. This is your chance to escape reality. Besides the usual suspects, check out these flavors (short sample!); Tuxedo, Almond Joy, Kokomo, Lemon Lovers, Earl Gray, Funfetti?!? Each sounds like a magic carpet ride. The only cupcake missing was one shaped like a seagull head, which sounds disgusting and it is but hear me out. Years prior I was with Rachel’s mom’s golden retriever on the beach where he was romping away. I kept wondering why this bouncing bundle of joy was making people scream until he ran up to me and smiled.

GAH!

Perched on his tongue staring at me was a perfectly preserved seagull HEAD. My turn to shriek. I’d love to see Bandon Bake & Brew create a seagull head cupcake in honor of doggo’s great caper, but for some reason they might not go for it.

Le Piece de Resistance

SPECIAL GUEST RACHEL and I took some Death By Chocolate/Not Seagull Head cupcakes to her pad, to be devoured under the watchful eye of her fantastical makaw. There are many reasons why Rachel is a special guest, for example, anyone living with a giant wild bird that can live for 80 years and bite your finger off is quite the brave character. Ask how she ended up with this loving commitment. Until then, let it be known Rachel and I met in college and became besties, which means we love each other and can destroy lives with shared knowledge of each others’ shenanigans. I’ll just state the fact that Rachel is a hospice nurse –  a most badass of jobs –  and even more crazy impressive is the fact that a hospice nurse in my parents’ home knew Rachel and absolutely worshipped her. To achieve this level of badassery is incomprehensible to me, so for god’s sake Rachel deserves all the spaghetti I can cook and pie and cupcakes whenever needed. That said,  a hospice nurse choosing Death By Chocolate cupcakes implies subconscious irony only and not of plotting a pleasant way to check out. I swear.

Oh! And those devilish cupcakes? Definitely magic. Even when scarfed under the watchful eye of Rico the Flying Dragon:

Rico on HIS magic carpet ride

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Surfing and Strolling near Rolling Pin Bake & Brew

SURFING: I didn’t have my gear with me, but it appears if you find a place without giant boulders and no boats to mow you over and no territorial teenagers, you’re in luck. Likewise find days when it is not windy HA!!!

STROLLING: I combo-ed this with a half-arsed surf check. You can get a great lengthy stroll along Bandon beach, complete with tide pools and doggies running around with severed bird heads.

Bandon Baking Company & Deli

160 2nd. St. SW * Bandon OR 97411 * 541-347-9440 * Bandonbakingco.com

To heck with it, here’s a quote straight from Bandon Baking Co’s website; “… When you NEED a cookie, pastry, dessert, French styled croissant, or a hand crafted loaf of bread – The bakery has been the go to place for locals and travellers alike…”

Yes I DO need! And so does my SPECIAL GUEST pal Rachel. That means a local (her) and traveller (me) did indeed go to the Bandon Baking Co.  and picked up a couple of ‘pie bars.’ These were basically pie slices shaped into slabs which I justified as ‘power bars’ because of the shape. And by inserting ‘Deli’ into their name, this implies the joint is not only a bakery, but serves full meals. Thus Rachel and I had those health bars for breakfast. A more delicious breakfast can not be had, nor more suitably sustaining for scuffling around Bandon beach in the 40 knot winds or whatever loco is on tap that day.

The Baking Company itself is easy to find, though she and I have not always been so navigationally savvy. One day many moons ago we decided to whip up from the San Francisco Bay Area to her hometown of Bandon by way of the scenic coastal route. Mistake. Nothing like driving behind RV’s scraping the side of the road pretending they’re tractors for hours and hours. Then we saw a sign for our next highway, which, relieved to free ourselves from the slow lane,  we foolishly took. Two hours later we find ourselves on the highway we wanted – but 150 miles SOUTH of  where we wanted to pop out. Oops! Could that highway sign have not been more specific? Must we be forced to consult actual maps?

 We arrived in Bandon Oregon in the pitch dark and many hours later with only a smattering of people worried about what the hell happened. I’m positive we ate at Bandon Baking Company on that trip, but too bad we did not eat pie THEN. Now thanks to the knowledge that comes with age, we know that pie is needed for any road trip.

I have no photo of our bakery pit stop, but here is a rendering of a photo we took in college – I’m pretty sure this was right before our incredible journey north:

Pisces sign or This Explains Everything

 

Thank you for feeding us, Bandon Baking Company!

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Surfing and Strolling near Bandon Baking Company

SURFING: I didn’t have my gear with me, but if you find a place without giant boulders and no boats to mow you over and no territorial teenagers, you might be in luck. Likewise find days when it is not windy HA!!!

STROLLING: I combo-ed this with a half-arsed surf check. You can get a great lengthy stroll along Bandon beach, complete with tide pools and doggies running around with severed bird heads.

 

First Rise Baking

630 Fleet St. * Brookings OR 97415 * 541-254-9164

These ladies are so cute! Look, even the only sign I could find ( online ) to copy for their store was a design by a kid. Major bonus points for deciding, “ To heck with the professional woo-woo, lil’ Jenny’s contribution is the best idea ever.” Pies of the West loves their choice.

I walked over to First Rise Baking from Dee-Ann’s Tea Room Cafe in a successful attempt to pig out on baked goods from Brookings. Once inside I realized if I was a local, I would spend copious amounts of time here. Plus, they had HAND PIES. And by ‘had’, I mean that literally, because they had run out! Another excellent sign.

Their scones seemed like the next closest thing to hand pies? So of course I took a couple and they were freaking yummy. While making my decision I chatted with the bakery lasses and promised not to screw up their picture. Here is the cartoon version, they really are this adorable ( and don’t sport whiteout in real life )

3 Knockouts!

Hanging above their heads is a pair of boxing gloves – there’s a story there –  which also happened to be ANOTHER sign. Shortly after arriving home an old injury flared up and prevented me from surfing for months. What did I do to stave off lack-of-surf-psychosis? Cardio kickboxing! And guess what, beating the shit out of huge bags burns about a bazillion billion calories. Hooray! I can keep eating lots and lots of pie!

Back to this crew. After eating lots and lots of pie all over,  I’ve discovered one consistency; people who bake pies are what’s right in the world. They’re truly splendid folks. In a world where the jerks dominate the news, meeting bakers is always an uplifting ( insert baking pun ) experience. Consider this declaration with extra weight (ooo another pun ) since it’s via me, a total introvert who cops out of  ‘too much’ hooman interaction on a regular basis. So hail bakers, I say, sprinkle your sugar and dazzle and boxing glove mojo all over the world.  Shoutout to First Rise Baking!

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Surfing and Strolling near First Rise Baking

SURFING: The Ultimate Rule of Surfing applies here, which is, if you leave your surf gear at home, you are guaranteed to get abnormally good surf conditions for days. Particularly in seasons and locations where you KNOW the surf will suck. This insult is survivable by knowing if you can’t surf, and know it’s good, don’t look. Thus I blew past the entire Oregon Coast with only minor pining glimpses outside Astrid’s windows.

STROLLING: There sure is, but I was unfortunately on this hurry-ish demon thing called ‘a schedule.’ However I did stroll from Dee-Ann’s to First Rise. Overachieving in Brookings!

 

 

 

Dee-Ann’s Tea Room Cafe

434 Redwood St. #6 * Brookings OR 97415 * 541-469-7240

Walking into this joint I feel like I stepped back in time, in the best possible way. Dee-Ann’s is an ‘old’ fashioned local cafe , literally, as it is festooned everywhere with vintage-y tea pots. As one who uses the occasional teapot as planters, storage, flower vases – in short, everything but tea – I approve. Also noted, it appears local yokel people eat and *gasp* actually meet up in person here I SAW NO COMPUTERS.

 This place had pie written all over it, and sure enough I ordered a big berry slice to go. Yum yum! If you want a hunk-a home-baked cafe style berry pie look no further. Comfort food at its finest! Delicious!!!

Dee-Ann’s Genie

Now flash forward from ‘old’ to ‘now’; to jog my memory I made reference notes on the places that got eaten by the Great Data Apocalypse. Helpful? No. Creative? Sure. My message for Dee-Ann’s instructs you to come in for biscuits , and that it got a great review from ( all caps copied precisely )  ITALIANS.

ITALIANS, of all people! It’s better not knowing what on earth I was thinking. The takeaway is, if THE ITALIANS give a good review, you better try the food! Nice work, Dee-Ann’s!

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Surfing and Strolling near Dee-Ann’s Tea Room Cafe

SURFING: The Ultimate Rule of Surfing applies here, which is, if you leave your surf gear at home, you are guaranteed to get freakish good surf conditions for days. This especially applies to seasons and locations where you KNOW the surf will suck. MY Ultimate Rule of Surfing is, if you can’t surf, and know it’s good, don’t look. Thus I blew past the entire Oregon Coast with only minor pining glimpses outside Astrid’s windows.

STROLLING: There sure is, but I was unfortunately on this hurry-ish demon thing called ‘a schedule.’ However I did stroll from Dee-Ann’s to First Rise. Overachieving in Brookings!

 

 

100 Mile Bakery

418 A St. * Springfield OR 97477 * 541-603-6354 * 100milebakery.com

Since we’d just nommed our way out of Ashland that morning via   The Village Baker,  Voice of Calm Stacey Marie and I were craving a healthy lunch en long route to picking up Astrid. We’d never heard of 100 Mile Bakery but discovered its existence thanks to what could be my last moment of faith in modern technology.

Driving into Springfield Oregon, we hove to and tried to find the bakery via smart phone map. At that point I realized that the only times I’d taken a wrong turn lately was with ‘route finding’ tech, either via bogus info or because a non-driver was looking at a screen and giving adamant directions while not seeing what was ACTUALLY GOING ON OUTSIDE. Sure enough, after a quarter of an hour we ‘discovered’ 100 Mile Bakery – 2 blocks from where we had parked.

Sigh. Well, sheer bliss once we honed in on the prize…

Stacey and I enjoyed soups and salads and teas and THEN, of course, desserts. We were wondering at the taste magic of our meal and it turns out that all the ingredients are grown within a 100 mile radius of the cafe….hence the name! The fact that the place is housed in a former church also adds to the saintly appeal. Coming off the occasionally bizerko  I-5 corridor the bakery certainly had a refuge vibe.

 Blessedly there WAS pie. They had kiwi-blueberry, but I grabbed a hazelnut crumble pot which is essentially a pie-in-a-jar. Stacey bought a wild nettle green onion corn muffin – have you ever heard of such a thing?!! Turns out there’s no better fuel for a marathon session of ‘Hair Nation’ karaoke. If we got tired we would just take another bite and away we’d rip! Open windows be damned! Talk about divine inspiration. Our legendary caterwauling will haunt portions of the I-5 corridor for time immemorial.

100 Mile Angel in front of their Holy Site

Also inspired was a declaration of war against the demons of modern computers. Did I take lots of pictures of 100 Mile Bakery? Did said pics get lost when my phone took a walkabout? Did my iPad’s email – the travel-y  reason for getting it in the first place – INSIST on not working unless it was upgraded, and after it  ‘improved’, now only uploads photos of drawings to Pies with evil lines clawing across the image? Were my photo references here saved thanks to taking iPad pictures of pictures on my phone in case my phone croaked? Were you even able to follow that?

I’m so sick of this time sucking shit I’m declaring Rebellion against Information Technology Tyranny. The goal is noble; stop being so dependent on techy crap that’s so fussy the only thing it consistently does is raise blood pressure. Here’s a sample of the Underground’s secret weapons;

D.O.D.’s got nothing on these babies

 Paper and pencils. Dumb phone. Polaroid camera not pictured, and PAPER MAPS. We’ve gone hard core. Unless I burn those maps for toasting marshmallows those lovelies will do. Their freakin’.  Job. J

oin the rebellion! And meanwhile I’ll feed you more information on the fly….when I manage to , errr, upload my pixelated pie stories.

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Semi-Bonus?!?:  As if to prove my point, the gods gifted me with a messy but okay sketch of 100 Mile angel baker, so I’m including it despite the ‘polished’ version above. Note the double duty as an info-dump for pie notes – they’re circling her like a holy aura.

She’s guarding the sneak peek at future Pie entries!

I’m coming back for more crumble pot pie, 100 Mile Bakery!

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Surfing and Strolling near 100 Mile Bakery

SURFING: NO.

STROLLING: There’s a lot of hiking around here, but we managed a fair stroll simply by getting turned around and misreading street signs.

The Village Baker

372 E Main St *  Ashland  OR 97520 * (541) 482-4087 * www.artisan-bakers.com

It took an ambulance to get me to The Village Baker, but I didn’t get TAKEN there by an ambulance, which will make sense in a minute.

My perambulating journey to this business began in the motel room where the infamous Stacey Marie and I were resting. We were making a pit stop on the long drive to pick up Astrid, and after shouting ourselves hoarse to ‘Hair Nation’, were ready to hit the sack. Ha.

Due to a nagging cough, after two weeks of sleep deprivation I decided now was the time to take a surprising different pill my new doctor prescribed me in lieu of what I’d been given by my last doctor a ways before.  I put it off because I’m sensitive to some medication and am reluctant to try unfamiliar ones – FOR GOOD REASON, cue ominous music – but wanted to do the adult responsible thing and get a decent night’s sleep.To be a safer driver. HA.

” Got some bad news ” I informed Stacey before I was unable to swallow or speak.

” Should I call an ambulance?” Voice of Calm Stacey asked.

And that’s how I ended up standing in a motel room wondering how long it would take for an ambulance to arrive if I stopped breathing. Then I proceeded to swirl and spit water as if my life depended on it, probably because it did.

10 minutes and a gallon of water  later, here comes the west coast’s crankiest ambulance duo.  They sat me in the back where my first thought was, ” Ooo! First ambulance ride.” Then they proceeded to act totally put out that I was actually sitting up and breathing.

” But you should’ve seen me 10 minutes ago! ” I apologized, then realized how absurd it was to feel bad for those guys  because I wasn’t turning blue. While checking vitals they took my water -which I longingly pined after, seeing how it had only totally saved my arse  – and begrudgingly offered me a lift.

I refused a ride with these curmudgeons but saint Stacey took me to the ER at midnight since for god’s sake, despite the dry heaving what if I’d swallowed or absorbed that satanic shit.  ER declared me fine but did say those types of medicines can be very dangerous, and Stacey revealed she’d read that particular doozy can be fatal if they open up in your mouth, which mine did. Awesome!

No sleep the rest of the night for some odd reason – what a perfect time to compose an all caps letter firing my doctor – and next morning we shook off the willies and tallied forth to seek pie. Thus The Village Baker.

NICEST BAKERY OWNER EVER. He chatted with us and woe onto him I spaced virtually everything he said, could it be due to leftover adrenaline from nearly kicking it the night before. I do remember that they bake a LOT of excellent goods, sell wholesale to various venues in the general area, and give away extra bread to feed the hungry. Freaking awesome people!! Faith in strangers restored!! I’m so glad we walked in there.  In homage here is a terrible picture of a wonderful person, complete with floating mini ambulances:

The heavenly bread

 I was so wackadoo I walked out with a roasted red pepper loaf instead of a sweet treat.  That #$$**ing little pill apparently put me of all people off sugars.  In any case I’m happy to say the loaf was scrumptious and was eaten barbarian style, aka ripping chunks off by hand. Never came close to a knife. It was epic. Seriously, do yourself a friendly favor and when you’re visiting Ashland, hit up The Village Baker. 

Bonus ( for me ). Now that we’ve featured the saint above, I present my vengeance. There’s nothing quite like finding out your saviors are actually two Oscar the Grouches driving a fancy can.  Pie to the face!

Ker-SPLAT!

 Safe and yummy travels to Ashland, ya’ll!

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Surfing and Strolling near The Village Baker

SURFING: I’m gonna call the surf break here, ‘Poison Wash’, counting gargling and spitting water for 45 minutes as surfing because heck,  that’s a lot of moving water. Preferably giving insanely bad chemicals a ride outta one’s mouth. Highly recommended surf break if you like a thrill.

STROLLING: We didn’t check out the surrounding parks and hills – oh they’re there! – but Stacey and I did walk the ‘straight shot’ to downtown and back from the motel which ended up being 6 miles.  Come to us for all your navigational needs.